Another Delco Guy In South Jersey

Wordless Wednesday

Exhibited!

It may not be my best work, but three of my images are on display until the end of the month! They are part of the annual Staff Show at The University of the Arts. It's pretty cool when you are having a bad day to look over and see your work hanging in a real exhibit hall. 

Stop by and see how talented my co-workers are!

Guapos Tacos Truck Spotted

Between the Kimmel Center and Hamilton Hall of the University of the Arts!

Wordless Wednesday

Happenings on South Broad Street

If you have tried to drive around The City of Brotherly Love anytime in the last 6 weeks, you know there is a movie being filmed in town. Paranoia is currently shooting right outside my window at the Kimmel Center.  In the 1400 block of Spruce St, there is a row of trailers which I am told house the cast while the shooting is going on.  Over on Broad Street, the entire block from Spruce to Pine is lined with equipment trailers stuffed full of rack of lights, colored plastic sheeting for the lights, scaffolding, and all kids of other cool equipment.

Paranoia will star Harrison Ford, Liam Hemsworth (who has brought skanky Miley Cyrus to town to entertain him) and Amber Heard.  Sadly I have not run into Amber Heard yet.  Harrison Ford won't regularly be in town during this part of the shoot but will be here in December when shooting resumes.

In other News, The Atlantic Building at Broad and Spruce, formerly site of Ted's Montana Grill and before that Avenue B by Neil Stein, has sold. Apartment developers the Post Brothers bought the mostly-empty but still-stately property for a cool $33 million.  Apartments are sure to follow.

Wordless Wednesday - Go Flyers!

The Things You See In Philly

I went for a lunchtime walk today and saw these signs. I did not see any elephants though. I was quite disappointed. I suspect that they have something to do with the Occupy Philly May Day Protests, but I am not sure. Anyone know?

Wordless Wednesday - Art

 

Xfinity Live - A Review

By now many of you have probably had the chance to get down to Xfinity Live, the new party venue in South Philly sports complex. Crowds have been huge, filling the place to capacity when there is an event at any venue. The opening night, when Third Eye Blind did a free concert, was seriously packed with the crowd overflowing long before showtime.

I had a chance to check things out last weekend as the place was opening and was pleasantly surprised at how much they have packed into what is a pretty small footprint. For a place that isn't quite done yet, there is certainly a lot going on!

The music stage out back is pretty sweet for the local band scene, offering a nice raised stage flanked by a short turf football field and a back bar faced with bricks from the original Spectrum. Even on a cold early April evening last Saturday, several local bands were able to generate some warmth as fans came out for long-time favorites Burnt Sienna, Mr. Greengenes, The Flamin' Caucausians, a Strange as Angels reunion and Kristen and the Noise all rocked for the Flyers fans and later the 76ers faithful.

One musical off-note from opening weekend - whoever the idiot was that booked Crazy in Stereo needs his head examined.  They were so bad I thought that some drunken wait staffers had stolen instruments and stormed the stage.

Inside there is the main space, the NBC Sports Arena, with it's MASSIVE 32 foot HDTV towering over bars, tables and banquettes. Each time I have been to Xfinity Live, this space has been packed.  It's a great place to watch the game if you don't a ticket and the food is certainly on par with sports complex places like Chickies and Pete's and McFaddens.  You will have to deal with some jostling around and it's hard to hear over the thunderous sound system and crowd noise, but you really aren't taking a date here for the conversation, right?

I was pretty impressed with the Victory Beer Hall, which was was packed with beer lovers sucking down pints of Downingtown's best brews.  While there is certainly some learning curve on the staff beer knowledge (No beautiful, the Storm King Stout is NOTHING like a Guinness, but you sure are cute in that outfit!) the place was electric.  The outside bar and fire pit were also a really nice addition to the space.

PBR (no idea what that stands for) is an odd duck of a bar.  It's got a mechanical bull in the middle of the bar, women in backless chaps, some very pretty margaritas and some solid smoked BBQ ribs.  So you can watch your drunk buddy last .8 seconds on the bull while your suck down a few big drinks served to you by someone who looks like she should be at Hooters.  This place seems to be a staff favorite after they get cut from other spots.  Broad Street Bullies Pub is your basic sports bar, replete with Flyers memorbilia and a quieter vibe than the other bars in the complex.

Finally, there's the Spectrum Grille, a quiet, high-end steakhouse featuring soft lighting and sleek, dark wood decor and my friend Noelle making great drinks at the bar.  The tuna carpaccio was very good and other bar customers had high marks for the steaks.  In the time my guest and I were there, we saw several former Flyers slip in the back entrance and order up some massive steaks.  It looks like the Flyers Alumni has a new clubhouse!

XL certainly answers the question 'Where should we meet before the game?' It is now THE destination for pre-gaming in South Philly.  McFaddens will still have its crowd for Phillies nights, but my guess is the C&P crowds will take a hit as folks realize they don't need to take a bus from the bar to the game. Groups will be able to meet here easily, have a few drinks before game time and then head off.  Folks without tickets won't be out of luck either, given the plethora of TVs and the mega giant HDTV screen in the main hall.

I think XL also has a lot of potential on non-game nights. The music venue will be a fun addition to the local rotation of spots you can see your favorite cover bands.  There is also room inside for smaller acoustic sets at Victory, PBR and Broad St., something that I think will make for and interesting evening, as you can walk from venue to venue as long as you are willing to carry your drink in a plastic cup.

I'll be headed back down soon to see how the place looks as it works out its growing pains.  XL was obviously overstaffed and overcrowded for opening weekend, so it will be interesting to see how the place looks on a 'normal' weekend. So far though, Xfinity Live looks like a winner!

Wordless Wednesday - MRGG and Kids at Xfinity Live!

 

Friday Fantastic Four - Dancing On Air

Tomorrow, a TV staple of my teenage years returns to the airwaves as WPHL-TV 17 revives 'Dancin' on Air' at 10 am.  The original show, much like its predecessor 'American Bandstand,'  featured local kids dancing to the latest 80s dance and pop hits. While I never appeared on the show due to my hereditary inability to dance, I do know several folks who appeared on the show.

The show helped make Madonna, Kelly Ripa, Duran Duran and others big stars and later went national as 'Dance Party USA,'. I was working as  DJ at the time and it was always great to see how crowds reacted to new music on the show.  While I will be busy tomorrow night for the new show's premier, I will definitely DVR it. 

All this got me to thanking about other things that I would bring back from my teenage years ...

What are the top four things you would bring back from your teenage years?

1. Pulsations - a great place to dance and party all night, but not as great a place to work!
2. Cruising In the Jeep - Top off, George Thorogood blasting, was a great way to start the weekend!
3. The Big Green, '77 Chevy - If Goot hadn't totaled it the day he bought it, the thing would still be running.
4. The Wharf - oh wait!  The Wharf still exists (Sort of)  And I was NEVER there as a teenager!

It's a big weekend for the Final Four, College Open Houses, Baseball Opening Days, Xfinity Live opening and so much more.  Relax and enjoy!

Glorious

Walking from one meeting on campus to another can sometime be a bit of a drag.  I pretty gladly walked up and down Broad Street for my midday meeting today.  72 degrees, slightly hazy sunshine and the promise of more to come this week had everyone out and about at lunch time.

There were the usual lunch truck crowds, smokers and homeless people.  But today they were joined by thousands of people who seemed enlivened by the simple act of getting outside and walking around on a beautiful (nearly) Spring day. I was among them, taking a few extra loops around blocks to extend my walk for a scant few minutes and enjoy all that mid-March in a mild Philadelphia winter has to offer.

And the best part is that tomorrow will be even better!

Friday Fantastic Four - March!

It's the first Friday in March.  March is one of my favorite months of the year, full of anticipation and ohpe for the end of winter and the start of spring.

What are your four favorite things about March?

1. Spring Training - It's pretty incredible how much news comes out of Florida every day about the Phils.  I am ready for Opening Day!
2. The Flower Show - America's premier flower show takes place right here in Philadelphia and it's always something special to see.
3. Spring Break - Two long weekends in a row and no students on campus is not a bad way to start the month!
4. March Madness - Whether it's small college conference championships this weekend, the D3 tournament the next three weekends or the Big Dance, this is the best time of year for college hoops!

Have a great weekend!

Friday Fantastic Four - Catholic High School Edition

While the Friday Fantastic Four is a day late, I have an excuse. Yesterday, pretty much everyone who went to Catholic school in the Philly area was watching our news feeds to see what the fate was of the high schools that a blue ribbon commission had recommended for closure.

The news broke yesterday afternoon and there was jubilation across the area as parents, students and alumni learned that all of the schools would be spared, though Prendie and Bonner will merge in order to survive. All of the FB posts, pictures of crying girls, biting commentary and emotion got me to thinking about my fore years at St. James in Chester.  And with those thoughts came today's fan four:

What were the four best things about going to Catholic high school?

1. Being part of something bigger than myself - We had a network, a brotherhood and even today, 17 years after Bevilacqua shut us down, STJ lives on!
2. Uniform skirts - Yes, I went to an all-boys high school, but whenever we could, we would get out early and shoot up to Cardinal O'Hara where the girls were!
3. Knowing every guy in my class - I graduated with 180 other guys.  I can honestly say that I knew every one of them, and probably knew every guy in school by name.  I'm not unusual.  Many of us are still in touch, 25 years later.
4. Having a celibate man teach us about the value of marriage - Phrases like 'allaying concupiscence' sure made us want to run out and get married, Fr. Brugger!

I feel great for everyone who helped save the Philadelphia area Catholic high schools from the chopping block, especially the Bonner and Prendie folks back home in Delco.  Congrats!

Friday Fantastic Four - I Love Philly!

So a couple weeks ago my Fantastic Four was on Philly things that I don't understand.  This week, I was driving though South Philly and realized as crazy as this town is some days, there is so much I love about it. Soooo ....

What do you Love about Philly?

1. The Italian Market - Seattle has Pike Place Market, New York has the Fulton Fish Market, DC has the Eastern Market, but none of them touches our own Italian Market.  Reeking of authenticity, this place has third-generation neighborhood shop-keepers alongside Amish purveyors and newcomers of all sorts.  The chaos makes this place worth a trip, even if you don't buy a thing.
2. The Restaurant Scene - With our own celebrity chefs, Kitchen Nightmares and Michelin Star drama and 13th St. Empires, we've got it all.  I like the diversity here.  You can get great cheesesteaks and hoagies, you can go ultra high end, you can hit a BYO, enjoy America's best beer scene or munch on tapas.  And then you can head out tomorrows night and do it again, because these ain't NYC prices.
3. City Hall - What's not to love about this place?  For years the tallest building in the city by gentleman's agreement, this is a COLOSSALbuilding.  We let protests camp at its base, watch Billy Penn pee when it rains, convince city councilmen not to jump from its heights and dress it up at playoff time.  Oh, and it's the center of government and a major city courthouse!
4. Manayunk - One of the first places I ever hung out in the city, it was where all the college kids came to town for fun before Old City was Old City.  I still like going back to the 'yunk after all these years.  I love the food, the beer, the bike race, the music, and yes, even the shopping.  Even when it floods, Manayunk comes back and makes everyone happy again next summer!

What do you love about the City of Brotherly love?

Have a great weekend!

Friday Fantastic Four - Weird Philadelphia

I have lived In the Philly region my whole life and I have to admit there are some things I just don't understand about my hometown.

What are the top four weird things about your home town?

1. The Mummers - I just don't understand the fascination.  Drunk, crossdressing union guys and banjo music?  What am I missing here? 
2. Wing Bowl - I wentto this bacchanalian event a few times as a young man, but I really didn't understand the draw of getting drunk at 5 am and watching guys eat so many cold chicken wings that they throw up.
3. Parking In South Philly - By all means, just stop your car in the middle of Shunk Street and run in to the deli to talk to Tony about that thing. Everyone will wait for you!  No problem!
4. Scrapple - Ugh.  Gritty processed pig parts.  If the diner grease wasn't enough to make you vomit, the texture of this Philly Phavorite sure will!

So what makes your home town special?  Everyone have a great weekend!

Wordless Wednesday

And That's The Ballgame - Andy Musser Passes

The three voices that I most associate with my youth have all left us now.  First 'His Whiteness,' Richie Ashburn stepped out of the announcer's booth in New York City and passed into the night after calling a Phillies - Mets game in the Phils' dreadful 1997 last-place season.

Fresh off calling the 2008 World Series win for the Phils, Harry Kalas died preparing for a game in Washington, DC.  I cried that day, and again a few days later when thousands welcomed Harry home to Philly one last time.  While we still get to hear him sing 'High Hopes' every time the Phillies win at CBP, I still tune in sometimes and expect to hear him calling the game.

And today we lost Andy Musser, the third member of the Phillies broadcasting crew of my youth.  He was always the quietest of the three, the most generally reserved, but I really think he only paled in comparison because of the two Hall of Famers he worked with.  His double play calls were as smooth as Bowa, Trillo and Rose were on the field.

Some would argue Musser's voice went silent years ago when the Phillies management pushed him aside to give Chris Wheeler a larger role.  I still heard a bit of a bit of it in my mind though until Harry passed a few years ago. Wheeler and Tim McCarver were a part of those broadcasting teams as well, but never really seemed to be as big a part.  McCarver went on to make it big in broadcasting.  Against all odds, Wheels is still here, over-analyzing every pitch.

I grew up lisetening to the Phils on the radio on my grandfather's porch, and on TV on Sunday afternoons at my other grandfather's in Essington.  The silences were as important as the things that were said.

Today, we lost my last link to the soundtrack of my summer afternoons and evenings. I'm sad, but I remember seeing Musser a few years ago at a beer event he was working.  Someone inevitably asked him if he missed the games.  He looked wistful for just a moment and said something like, 'I'd be crazy if I didn't, but I've got a good life.'

Andy, thanks for all the great memories and say hello to Whitey and Harry for me.  I'll have an Anchor Steam for you!

Philly is Still Occupied - For Now

Dilworth Plaza is still an occupied camp as of lunch time today, with about half as many tents in evidence than there were 2 weeks ago. 

I took a walk on this beautiful late November Monday, enjoying the bright blue sky and what is probably the last day we will see with 60 degree temperatures until April.  There were throngs of people out walking the Center City Philadelphia sidewalks, and lots of them were headed over to Dilworth Plaza, site of the Occupy Philly encampment.

Since the group was supposed to be out by late yesterday, some of the Occupiers have moved on.  Others are very much  still there.  Signs up around the plaza note that the Occupy Philly group plans to move to a number of decentralzied locations once the inevitable forcible eviction begins.

The mix of hard-core homeless to hard-core activist is about 50-50 right now, with several dozen of each group milling around quietly.  Police and media are prominently present.  There is a much quieter air than I have seen before, no bullhorns or group chants, no music or any really signs of energy.

Warm food was being distributed, a few folks were packing up, and mostly people were sitting around, waiting to see what is going to happen next.  I didn't bring my Canon on my walk today, as the big camera attracted some unwanted attention on my last visit.  Instead, I snapped today's photos with my HTC Thunderbolt camera.  Many others were doing the same thing, documenting what it seems may be the final day that Occupy Philly calls Dilworth Plaza home.

Changes At Occupy Philly

Yesterday I took a bit of a walk at lunch and headed over to the Occupy Philly encampment at Dilworth Plaza, adjacent to Philadelphia City Hall.  I have visited four times since the occupiers took root there in September.

There has been some news lately, as just after the election, Mayor Nutter took to the airwaves to declare that the Occupy Philly group had changed, and that given the change he was going to have to start dealing with them differently.  Nutter noted issues with public health and safety as well as the group's refusal to move to an area across the street to allow a planned renovation of the Dilworth Plaza site to begin.

The Occupy Philly folks on the other hand have shot back that they have not changed, but rather it's Nutter that has been on the move.  Various Occupy Philly members made statements in stark contrast to the Mayor Nutter's allegations.  And, predictably, there were some folks in the middle, not sure who was right as the movement heads into the winter.

From my visit, I have to say that the encampment is distinctly different than it was in late summer.  Then it seemed like a large portion of the group were college students enjoying the warm nights and permissive atmosphere rather than having to stay in their dorm rooms.  When I visited during the day, the core group was a combination of aging hippies,  some homeless people, a group of hard-core activists and a sprinkling of young people.  All of those folks were there in the evening hours too, but there was also a night-time influx of vocal college aged-students, suspiciously clean for folks allegedly living outside.

Things have changed a lot in the last few weeks.  The population of hard-core homeless is much greater.  There are obviously people there up to no good.  Most of the college students are gone.  Many of the older folks have moved on as well.  The police presences is decidedly more edgy. The place has the look and smell of a homeless encampment; it does not feel like a political movement from my perspective. 

My photos don't show the change as much as they should.  I didnt take as many this time and I definitely was careful who I shot.  For the first time, I was subjected to open hostilty as I walked among the tents.  There were areas where I not only didn't feel welcome, but I didn't walk though because they did not appear safe.  It's also clear that there are concerns among those camping there about safety. 

I am not sure what the future is for Occupy Philly.  Will it be cleared away by force like Occupy Wall Street and Occupy Oakland?  Will they move across the street to the area suggested by the city?  With the movement continue to with as the temerature drop anonly those experienced with sleeping outside in a Philadelphia winter are willing to stay?

Whatever happens, I do feel like it will be happening soon.

Barbuzzo Review

Maybe the best restaurant in Philly right now.  No hyperbole there.

Caution - you should know before reading the rest of the review that I am in full-on love with Barbuzzo at the moment.

First, it's a beautiful space.  At night it's a bit hard to tell with every table filled from 5 though 11 pm, but stop by for lunch and look around.  The place was meticulously put together by people with a wonderful eye for detail and quality.

Second, the food.  Good lord, what flavors and preparation.  Amazing vegetarian soup is a wonderful way to start any meal.  The distinct flavors of each of the vegetables are evident.  I also have had a chicken vegetable chorizo soup that was simply stunning.

The star of the antipasti plate was the buffalo mozzarella with an incredible arugula pesto.  It's a fair sized meal, or an excellent sharing appetizer, and under priced at $13.

I have also enjoyed the Barbuzzo burger.  It's a juicy, tender blend of salty and sweet with a tomato onion spread that makes me consider if it's better than the burgers at Village Whiskey.  Maybe not quite, but close.  Marcie Turney has an inspired menu and Paul Lyons and Chris Davis are doing amazing work in the kitchen.

Third, the drinks.  It's a well-tended bar with every ingredient you could ever hope for.  The Sazerac 13 features Old Overholt Rye and a several rather hard to find bitters.  There are 6 taps of excellent craft brews as well as a number of great canned and bottled beers.  If you are a wine fan, this is a super list by the glass, rivaling any wine bar in the area.

I have had great service in my two visits, though things are a bit noisy and tight in the evening.  It's a really fun place and certainly the best food I have had out in some time.  Make it a point to get in there!  And stop by their website.  The blog features reviews by people more famous than me.

Wordless Wednesday

Occupy Philly

It's a beautiful day for a walk, so I took some time earlier today to head up Broad Street to Dilworth Plaza, next to City Hall to see the Occupy Philly rally/demonstration/gathering.  Honestly, if not for the police on every corner and the middle of Broad Street, you might not know anything was going on.

From 200 feet away, there was no sign of the latest outgrowth of the Occupy Wall Street movement.  On my way into work today, there were helicopters in the air and news trucks everywhere.  By noon though the 200 or so Occupiers were mostly surrounded by cops, confused homeless people, citizens documenting the situation,  and folks like me, just enjoying the day.

Clearly the Occupiers had thought things were going to be bigger, staging a Medic area, a family zone, sign painting stations and food distribution areas.  None of that appears to be really necessary.  There were plenty of signs and food. 

What there wasn't was a coherent message.  Forgiving student loans was a common these, corporate greed another.  But mostly the crowd seemed to be trying to convince itself that the gathering meant something.  I just didn't feel it.  To me, the folks there looked like an odd blending  of the kind of folks you see on the steps at UArts every day and some seriously aging hippies.  There were also several kids who can't play guitar.  Maybe they read somewhere that you need to have guitars at protest rallies.

I have to say that i see this movement as a left wing version of the Tea Party.  Nothing too organized, very diffuse ideaology, no center theme.  Except that they are angry with the way things are and they want change.  Both groups are dissatisfied with the way the nation we live in is being run.  Neither seems to have a clue as to what to do about it though.

The Tea Party movement was co-opted by the far right of the Republican Party, and this Occupy movement seems to have been co-opted by labor unions.  It will be interesting to see if the unions have as much success focusing the anger of the Occupiers.  It will also be interesting to see how many show up tomorrow.

Phils Set To Close It Out

While some might argue that it would be better for the Phils to drop today's 4th game of the NLDS in St. Lois, so they can win it here at home in front of the CBP faithful, I am here to tell you the Phils will win tonight and end this nailbiter of a series.  They've done everything possible to create interest and buzz in the first round of the playoffs, but this one is only going 4 games folks.

They've come from behind, blown a big lead, and hung on by their fingernails in the first three games.  I recommend stocking up on the Xanax and Pepto for tonight's tilt as well.  Oswalt looked great in his last start, but the Phils' bats, especially at the bottom of the line up could use a wakeup call. 

The Texas Rangers have already taken one Cinderella out of the playoffs, dispatching the Rays, who dropped 3 straight after opening the series with a win.  Now it's time for the Phils to end the Cardinals season and rest up for the NLCS.

It's great being in town right now, with the seas of red on the sidewalks, the bridges decked out and encouraging the home team and a giant jersey making its way around town.  I made it down to the staggeringly difficult Game 2, but sadly I have a work commitment, so I will miss out on the action, but thank goodness for my HTC Droid Thunderbolt.

Go Phils!

Sbarga Will Give It A Go

The restaurant space at the corner of Broad and Pine on the first floor of Symphony House in Center City Philadelphia has had a terrible history. The signs are going up today for celebrity chef Kevin Sbraga's eponymous new restaurant in the space. I am looking forward to seeing what the Johnson and Wales trained chef and his wife can bring to the space that last housed noodles joint Chew Man Chu and that opened as the forgettable DuJour.

I will get in there as soon as it's open and get you a review.

What An End to the MLB Season!

First, let me express my condolences to my friends who are Red Sox fans, especially Susan and Paul.  Hopefully your significant others have removed all sharp objects from your vicinity.  I said a few weeks ago that the Red Sox were lucky to have such a weak schedule down the stretch because they were playing terribly.  The schedule wasn't weak enough.

While my brother wrote the best article I have seen on last night's amazing finish to a great season, the chart above came from a great article at the NY Times blog 538, usually on political statistics. Using a slightly tortured bit of math, he pegged the odds of all of last night's games ending as they did at 1 in 278 million.

It was truly a phenonmenal night of baseball.

In all the hysteria, it's easy to over look what the Phils did this week.  With everyone from me to Ricky Bo saying, "They better get going, you can't just flip a switch and turn it back on," the Phillies did just that, standing on the gas and sweeping the Braves en route to a team-record 102 wins on the season.

It's a bit sad that Major League baseball, always looking for ways to mess up a good thing, seems to have decided to add another wild card spot.  Why's that sad?  Because none of the games last night would have meant a thing with that extra spot. Hopefully they re-consider.

It's a busy weekend for me with some work, Panek Oktoberfest, soccer, travel baseball, and Chowderfest, but I will do my best to catch the Phils' games at 5 on Saturday and 8 on Sunday.  There's not much better than October Baseball!

On Success

We all know what success looks like or feels like.  The effusive warmth of accomplishment.  The buoyancy of being surrounded by well-wishers.  The energy of the celebration.

We all get a few such moments in our lives. Some of us get more moments than others.  Some of the moments are more ecstatic than others.  There's always a coming down after a success, a period of quiet, of withdrawal.  And, at least for me, of wondering.  Wondering when the next success will come or if that's it for a while.

Unless you're the Philadelphia Phillies of the last 5 years.

In which case, it's just one success after another, from winning the NL East 5 consecutive times, to having a parade, to signing the best rotation in baseball. 

My baseball-crazy 11 year old son John wears #34 for his baseball team in honor of his favorite Phillie, Roy Halladay.  He got to witness in person the Phils clinching the NL East over the weekend.  It was his second time seeing it in person, the first being that magical Spetember 27th of 2008. 

I'm 41.  I've only seen them clinch in person once. 

Now thankfully the one I witnessed was with him in '08, but it led met to consider how my son thinks about the Phillies and approaches success in general.  In his memory, the Phillies have always been a winner.  There's always been Red October.  He's never known the disappointment of a baseball season that is over before the dog days of August.  I am not sure he's ever been to a Phils' game that wasn't sold out.

This run has almost ensured that John will be a Phillies fan for life.  The excitement, the passion of the city and region, the sheer joy of it all make it a certainty.  But what has it done to prepare him for the lean times that will most certainly come at some point? 

Since the stadium is packed every night and the streets of Philadelphia are flooded with red shirts and hats, it may not be for a while.  But one day this train will slow down.  A free agent will sign elsewhere.  One too many prospects will be traded away.  Reuben Amaro won't pull off the miracle trade deadline deal.  And Red October will fade.  How will this new generation of fans approach a team that is .500.  What will Citizens Bank Park feel like on a future September night when the home team is just playing out the string in front of 25,000 morose folks?

On a larger note, how has this unparalleled athletic success of the region's baseball team affected what young fans will accept as success in general.  Does it have to be straight A's, or is a C in the mix ok?  Does it have to be Ivy League, or is a state school ok?  Is rec league acceptable, or is it travel team or bust?

I'm just not sure.  But for now, it doesn't really matter.  The Phils are in the playoffs and (with the exception of the NBA season) Philly sports is in a pretty darn good place.  We can all live vicariously thought the exploits of men who make millions to play a game.  And for a few more weeks we can savor their success as our own.

Opening Day on Google Maps

I was playing on Google Maps this evening and wandered by the Philadelphia Stadium area.

 
View Larger Map

There were cars in the lots.  "Hmm. That's interesting," I thought.  "I wonder what the event is.  From up high it looked like the The Linc was lined for soccer and that Citizens Bank Park had tarps around home plate. "Like for batting practice," I thought.

I zoomed in closer.  And as I did I noticed the beer garden and radio tents set up near the Third Base Gate.  I zoomed in closer and realized I was looking at a satellite image of the Phils 2010 Opening Day!  "Holy shit!"  I thought.  "I am IN this picture!!!"

I compared it to a few photos I had taken that day and then looked around for someone to tell.  After exhausting my son and a few other IM buddies, I decided I needed to tell all of you as well.  I can't tell EXACTLY what time it is when the shot was taken, but it's a few hours before game time.  There are not many people watching BP or Mr. Greengenes, but the parking lots are full of tailgaters.

Pretty darn cool!

Celebrating An Autumn Weekend

Vetri's 2010 Autumnal Display
Originally uploaded by Cavalier92

As the temperature struggles into the mid-60s today and the Phils wrap up the regular season, I'm enjoying a day in my study, organizing photos, playing a few games and watching two televisions at the same time.

It has been a beautiful weekend here in the Delaware Valley. John's Fall Ball team played yesterday under the proverbial "sky so blue it hurts your eyes just to look at it." While the result was a loss, there were a lot of positives to go around, from John's RBI single though the hole to LJ's perfect inning, to Colin making solid contact at the plate.

Later in the afternoon, we headed into Philadelphia for the Mid Town Village Fall Festival. This even should ne re-named "People of Every Variety Getting Drunk While Wandering Around The Gayborhood." We enjoyed ourselves, taking in faux Sumo wrestling, sampling the offerings from Zavino, Bindi and El Vez and jamming to the music from Rich and his friends from "Swift Technique."

After grabbing a bite with Ed and the gang at Valanni, we headed home to an early night on the couch taking in "The Blind Side." I saw the sappy adaptation of Michael Oher's transformation from homelessness to the NFL a few months back on a plane, and chose it again last night over old standby "All The Right Moves," which just seemed like too dark a way to end a good day.

It was a good weekend to be out and about , since it looks like the weather for the week is cool and rainy, with little chance to get out and enjoy the early fall colors.

Well I am off to watch the return of the Kevin Kolb era as Michael Vick has gone down and the second half is about to start. Should be interesting ...

Happy Birthday America!

Old Glory at CBP
Originally uploaded by Cavalier92

Today is the most American of our holidays. Each July 4th, we spend the day celebrating our nation by eating, drinking, watching baseball, playing in the pool and buying things. We cap the day off by watching things blow up. Here in the Philadelphia region, hundreds of thousands will gather on a plot of ground named for one of the greatest patriots in our history, Ben Franklin, and listen to music and watch fireworks.

Reflection is not a particularly American process. We fancy ourselves as "do-ers," the kind of folks who get things done, not the kind who sit around thinking about the past. This, in a sentence, explains a great deal about our foreign policy.

Today is a day that deserves some reflection. It was on this date. after a stifling late spring and early summer of political dealing in Philadelphia, that a group of white men announced that they had decided that the former American colonies of Great Britain were now a separate nation. In that most famous of American sentences, Thomas Jefferson wrote that:

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.

The document they published on this day in 1776 borrowed heavily from the work of French and English and French philosophers, but the process that took to creating a nation was American at its heart. Deals were cut in smoky back rooms and taverns. Those who disagreed were tossed out and arrested. What we celebrate today as a great time of national unity was in fact really a tipping point, a moment in time where the inertia of loyalism was overcome by the fervor of revolution and a new nation struggled into being. Thousands celebrated in the streets, but still others packed their things and shuttered their businesses, heading 'home' to England.

Noting the split that was in the air is important I think. Though all of the internal strife, we came together as a people and as a nation. Certainly it helped that there was tyranny to fight. A great enemy makes it easy to unite. It would take years to allow this nation to stand on its own, and even then, there would be problems. It would take nearly a century to begin to address the omissions of the founders.

Another war would be needed to give black Americans the beginnings of freedom in America. After fifty more years of complex social struggle, women would be recognized as more than property. 234 years after "all men" were declared "equal" we are still struggling with recognizing the right of any person to love and marry another.

America is imperfect. But she is the greatest imperfect nation ever created. And while we still struggle to rise to the high ideals the drafters of the Declaration of Independence set forth for us, there is an immense amount here that I am very proud to be a part of. The Declaration is an aspirational document, one that each of us has a responsibility to seek to work to each day.

Go forth ans enjoy the great beauty of this country today, gather freely and express your freedom as you see fit. And remember the struggles it took to ensure those rights for you. And especially those who do not yet enjoy them.

Happy 234th birthday America!

Canadians Loose on Broad Street!!!

As I was ordering my overly complicated coffee drink at Starbucks at Broad and Pine, the room went deathly silent. Four Montreal Canadiens fans had walked in and were being sized up by the caffeine addicts.

Only one had the courage to have his photo taken. Apparently the others are home from work because they don't feel well. There was a good degree of confidence that the series will be tied up tonight. Apparently they had been drinking their lunch.

Go Flyers!!!

***UPDATE***

These guys are visiting from Montreal and are actually pretty nice guys.  A shout out to the garage attendant at the PPA lot at 337 S. Broad who gave them a hard time but did it in a friendly way.  Take that all you folks who say Philly fans don't know how to behave!

Bike Lane Blowback

I like the concept of Philadelphia's Center City bike lanes. Creating safe lanes for 'green' traffic appeals to the environmentalist in me. The efficiency nut in me though is appalled by the mess the nearly-empty bike lanes make of traffic.

Spruce Street has become a constant center of gridlock, with a solid lane of buses, cars and trucks queued from Old City to Rittenhouse. With an empty lane right next to it, begging to be used to fix the problem.

I'm not sure what the solution is. The mayor has made it pretty clear that the bike lanes are here to stay. The extra 10 minutes they add to my daily commute aren't too bad. I guess I could live with the whole thing if only people used the bike lanes.

And there lies the issue. The lane is empty 90% of the time. When it isn't empty, it's being used as a turn lane or simply stolen by taxi drivers. There seem to be the usual number of bikers on the sidewalks of the city, so I have to assume that the bike lane project is yet another urban transit failure in a city with a history of them.

Eventually the bike lane project will go the way of the Chestnut Street Pedestrian Mall, the Penn's Landing Light Rail line and so many other well-intentioned but poorly utilized ideas in Philadelphia. Until then I will sit in traffic, resisting the urge to floor it and race down the empty bike lane.
 

It Was Only A Matter Of Time

I've written before about the nightclub atmosphere down at Citizens Bank Park. I don't think it's a bad thing, but things get out of hand now and then.  Apparently last night's Dollar Dog Night was one of those out of hand nights at the ballpark.  Among the 45,000 drunks on hand was a 17 year old who ran out on the field waving a rally towel. 

While the rest of us tuned into the Phils' loss saw nothing but Ryan Howard laughing into his glove, this intrepid YouTuber caught the mayhem on his phone.

This morning all Channel 29 and Steve Keeley are talking about is the use of the Taser by the Philadelphia Police Officer to subdue the fan.  How about we talk about how the kid got into that condition and how much abuse the cop had to put up with before he decided to take the kid down with an electric dart to the back?

I say if you run onto the field, you get what's coming to you.

Zavino - Meh

We'd been trying to get into Zavino for a few months now.  The consistent 90 minute wait times on Friday and Saturday nights were too much to ask with so many new places opening, so we kept moving on.  This past Saturday night as Center City buzzed with the warm weather and the Phils drubbing of the Mets, we seemed to have gotten lucky.

After initially hearing that the wait was 'probably only a half hour or more,' we go the news that a deuce had just opened on the sidewalk and we could be seated right away!  That was good news since the tiny, almost crowded dining room at Zavino was super-hot and way too noisy to hold a romantic conversation, and I had romance on my mind!

The wire table and chairs we were led to seemed perfectly adequate if a bit below standard restaurant quality.  Our 'server' greeted us a few minutes later by explaining that Zavino had complimentary still or sparkling water.  I asked if he was hustling nodding at the full restaurant and he faked a laugh and splashed some into our glasses and disappeared.

Time passed.

Our 'server' returned to ask what we want to drink.  I asked him about what rye they use in the Sazerac cocktail on the menu.  He looked at the sky and sighed. "No. It varies," he said.  No offer to find out, no admission that it was odd he had no idea.  I said ok, the Sazerac was fine.  My lovely date ordered a Troeg's Dreamweaver and our 'server' stormed off. No inquiry about whether we wanted an appetizer, no refill on the water.

A few minutes later, the beer was dropped without comment or eye contact and we were left to gaze at the woeful 12 ounce mug of Dreamweaver that still managed a 2 inch head.  More time passed and the exceptionally well-made Sazerac was abandoned to the table for my further contemplation.  And we had plenty of time to contemplate those drinks.  About about 20 minutes later, a hostess noticed four empty glasses on our table and refilled the water and too refill orders for the bar.

Then a strange thing happened.  The 'server' showed up, and asked if we were ready to order.  No.  That's not the strange part.  The strange part was that when I said yes, the hipster-turned-hopefully-soon-to-be-unemployed-waiter got his pad out, looked to his left and walked away as I ordered.  I've never seen anything like it.

A full 33 minutes after he took our drink order, and after ducking past our table numerous times, the young miscreant finally decided we had waited long enough to be allowed access to actual food.  We ordered appetizers and then had to nearly physically restrain him to put in our entree order at the same time.

After first getting the wrong food to the table, we got the grilled zucchini (her) and the prosciutto (me) for our first course.  We'd been on there more than an hour at the point both appetizers finally made it to the table.  Sadly the food was not memorable.  The zucchini was shockingly flavorless, in a melange of oil and grated pecorino and romescu cheeses served cold. The 7 delicate slices of prosciutto were a nice portion, but simply could not stand up to the scorchingly hot day they had apparently had.

We were starving, so we ate.

The pizzas arrived comparatively quickly, but still a few minutes apart.

I had the polpettini, which was a crispy pie with huge fresh basil leaves, provolone cheese, red sauce and near-microscopic veal meatballs.  It was sadly average, and depressingly was the best food we had all night.  My lady had the Kennett, with three different mushrooms over a bland white sauce and burnt crust.  

Once again, we were starving, so we ate.

A few words about the restaurant itself.  The door area is cramped, with the appetizer station immediately to your right as you come in.  The tables are arrayed to the left, with windows onto Sansom Street.  The bar is a fairly ample expanse of white marble for such a small room.  You have to walk through the server area to get to the bathrooms, where the sinks are rather oddly outside the toilet rooms.  The outdoor seating is along Sansom Street and is hampered by a narrow, sloping sidewalk.  The fits and finishes of the spaces are very well executed and it has a nice atmosphere overall.

The upshot of the night is that we could have handled poor service or average (to below average) food, but not both.  It's pretty clear that the ownership group is pushing the ability of the kitchen to get food out and the staff to serve the space they have.  I assume that the problem is there are barely enough seats to make the space profitable and that the kitchen is undersized. The fix is to short staff the front and overwork the kitchen. I know the owner is the chef, but he's missing some of the fine points on quality control.

While I left a perfectly appropriate 15% tip, I will admit leaving a rather scathing note about our waiter with the hostess stand.  Hopefully someone reads it.  It's pretty bad when you watch another 2 person table get seated after you with the same waiter, get drinks, appetizers and dinner all before you and leave before you have gotten a check.

I generally don't read the reviews of a place until I wrote my own, but now that I do, apparently our visit may have been an isolated experience.  I'm not sure it's worth going back to find out.

Totally Philly!

Me: That's Vince Gill's bus. You can't give him a ticket.

PPA Officer: Never heard of him. He's getting a ticket. This is Broad Street. You can't park here.

Guess she has A) Never been to South Philly and B) not really gotten into country music.

Chew Man Chu

Occupying the space formerly known as DuJour at Broad and Pine, Chew Man Chu is a welcome addition to the foodscape on the Avenue of the Arts.

Kristin was my perky guide to the menu and she let me know that the portions were fairly large and would be served as the kitchen prepared them rather than in courses. She approved my selection of Ox Tail Soup Dumplings and Chicken Satay Salad.

I was attentively hovered over for the 20 minutes it took for the food to come out. The chicken was grilled in a very sweet sauce and presented on skewers with a generous helping of sweet peanut satay. The 'salad' portion was a pile of crisp sliced cucumbers and red onion.

The four golf-ball sized dumplings were served in an over-large bowl and swam in a tarragon, wine, vinegar and ginger broth.

The dishes were nicely prepared and presented, but the chicken was overly sweet. There was no easy way to eat the large cuts of chicken without a knife to cut them up. I thought the use of the word 'salad' was a bit of a stretch.

The meaty dumplings were quite good, but varied a bit in temperature. The savory broth was an excellent counter to the chicken.

The place is owned by the same group that owned the predecessor restaurant. They have remodeled a bit, adding a full bar with 6 seats featuring wine, bottled beer and cocktails.

Overall, Chew Man Chu is worth a look. The food and ambiance are quite chic and there is nothing like it in the area. The staff is friendly and helpful and you get a good bit of food for your money.

New on South Broad Street

Chew Man Chu is set to open this week at Broad and Pine at Symphony House. The space has been vacant only a month since the closing of DuJour. Chew Man Chu appears to fix the prior outlet's error of not having a bar.

Things look a little harried and hurried today, but I will have a review when they open!

So Maybe I Was Wrong

I recently said in this space that I thought that "There has been a subtle chilling effect on personal conduct that I attribute largely to the prevalence of cell phone cameras and social media sites."

Given last night's celebrations of the Phillies winning the National League Championship Series and the subsequent displays of public stupidity, i am forced to reflect that people are basically capable of anything when you add enough alcohol to the mix.

Hat tip to meech.one at The Fightins for the clip.

There is quite a collage of images up at MyFoxPhilly.com.

Friday Fantastic Four

Earlier this week you might have seen the post I had about the display celebrating the coming of Autumn in front of Marc Vetri's restaurant on Spruce Street.  There was an array of flowers, a dozen or more pumpkins and a box of apples for passers by to sample.  Sadly some cretins smashed the pumpkins and stole the apples and we are left with only the flowers.

This pisses me off.  You've got a guy trying to do something nice for his neighbors and the community and some clueless jerk shows us his true colors by destroying it.  Classy!

So this leads me to this week's Fantastic Four:

What four things piss you off the most?

1. Senseless destruction - this one tops it all for me
2. People who spoil secrets. - just plain old mean
3. People who don't clean up after their dogs.  How about I come over and take a dump on YOUR lawn?
4. Littering - you can't wait until you get home to toss your Big Gulp cup? You gotta throw it out the window?

A bit of a downer way to start the weekend, but please go forth and enjoy!

It Must Be Fall

Marc Vetri has the pumpkins and apples out in front of his eponymous Spruce Street restaurant, so it must be fall!

Jody Mac Signs off at 950 WPEN

Jody's Last PM Drive Show
Originally uploaded by Cavalier92

I kinda saw this one coming, but it still stung when my brother Matt called me and told me that Jody MacDonald, perhaps my favorite sports talker in the business had just signed off for the final time on his WPEN 950AM show.

I've listened to Jody for 20 years, first catching his overnight show on WFAN when I was working overnights. Later, when he was hosting mid-days on 610 WIP, we met when he came to the college radio station I worked at. I still caught his show a good bit when he departed for WFAN, but I was thrilled in 2005 when WPEN made Jody the centerpiece of its switch to sports radio and put him on afternoon drive against Howard Eskin.

As much as I love listening to the guy, he was never the brash, confrontation host that radio GMs and PDs seem to want these days. Wry and funny and full of substance, his shows are for the serious sports fan. So it came as no surprise when the station brought in Mike Missanelli and moved Jody to mornings.

When the move to mid-days came after his heart bypass surgery and he was paired with Harry Mayes, the writing was on the wall. Jody was playing out the string here in Philly and even his most frequent listeners knew it.

I will say here today that I am about done with 950. I used to be a big Misanelli fan, but his show seems sophomoric and silly. The station that said it would never insult its listeners and would be a different kind of sports talk is now just a poor second rate imitation of 610, the much-diminished giant of Philly sports talk.

My best wishes to Jody MacDonald and his family. I will be listening on Sirius and on 1050AM.

Tragedy at CBP

A 22 year old man lost his life last night in an altercation outside Citizens Bank Park while the Phillies were defeating St. Louis.  The altercation allegedly started inside McFadden's at the Ballpark and moved down Pattison Avenue around the 7th inning. It's a terrible thing and one that does little but magnify Philadelphia's reputation as the rowdiest sports town in America. 

A while back I lamented that The Bank had basically become a 43,000 seat bar.  Security has certainly tightened since then, but it should be noted that this incident apparently started with a bachelor party at McFadden's.  I'm reasonably certain that a scan of St. Louis or Miami or Detroit or Dallas papers this morning will find at least one other death outside a bar.  However the talking heads will be all over our reputation as the worst fans in sports.

On a side note, it's shocking to me that you've literally got to search Philly.com for information on this terrible incident and what you get is this pathetic entry.  I can't believe this is the only content you have on the site about this horrible incident. I know this story happened in the evening, apparently after the Sunday paper deadline, but you're not a Sunday paper anymore gang. To not have a story up on the front page shows a shocking lack of focus on breaking news.

My thoughts got out to the young man who lost his life and to his family.

The Best Blog Post Ever

Every time a Philly sports team makes the playoffs the sports fans of this town are forced to endure a national cliche fest that paints us all as grade school dropouts who threw snowballs at Santa, booed Jesus in the manger, wear white sheets and pointed hats to games and hate anyone not named Rocky Balboa.

This week's drive by assassination of Philadelphia sports fans comes to us courtesy of Fox Sports' Ian O'Connor.  This pretentious ass gets his though from an anonymous blogger named Gimpy von Hogaknocker who takes apart O'Connor's overwritten bag of BS on a line-by-line basis.

It's not just the best Philly sports blog post every (sorry E and Matt), it's not just the best sports blog post ever.  It's the best fucking blog post ever.  Period.

Nice work Gimpy!

Some Really Great Writing

I'm pretty quick to jump on journalists when they mail one in, so I thought I'd take a moment today to compliment a stunning piece in today's Inquirer.

Melissa Dribben brings light to the sad story of Zal Chapgar, a young man who most of us knew only as the person who threw himself from the Lowes Hotel in Philadelphia earlier this month.  Her prose is warm and empathetic, but also weighty with resolve to tell the tough parts of the story as well.

I'm not going to do a capsule here, I can't possibly do it justice.  Just go here and read it.  It's Dribben's best work in years.

The Streets of Philadelphia

As most of you know, I work in Center City Philadelphia and commute in daily  from the South Jersey suburbs.  Most days it takes about 30 minutes.  Some days longer.  But almost every day I see something interesting.

Smart cars, fender benders, clueless dog walkers, movies shoots, girlfriends throwing the ex's stuff out a 3rd floor window.  You never know what the commute will bring.  Lately the Tylenol Taxis have been attracting attention.  Billed as "London Taxis," the Illinois-licensed cars are left hand drive, so I am not sure how accurate that phrase is, but they are a pretty cool ad concept.

Recently the commute has been complicated by the installation of giant brown metal boxes at every intersection.  The brown boxes are everywhere in Center City!  Part of the project that is replacing all of the traffic lights and adding street lights throughout Philly.  It's a great project for the guys tearing up all the streets and installing ribbons of sticky hot patch on every corner, but I'm about done with it.

I'm not sure the long term value of the project outweighs one or two ugly brown boxes on every corner.  These monsters are over five feet tall and two feet square.  I am told by some of the workers that they house the controls for the traffic signals.  And "some other stuff."  Hmm.  Sounds faintly like Dick Cheney might be involved.  I thought that technology had made some advances in terms of miniaturization in the last century or so.  These babies look like they could house a Cray supercomputer.

And finally you've got the recent appearance of these odd ads on the sidewalk in front of various Avenue of the Arts venues.  I'm not sure what they're all about, but they encourage you to call a Northern Virginia area code.  Random stuff appears on the sidewalks and streets of Center City all the time, but the fluorescent paint caught my attention.  They didn't hold up well to the recent rain so it's unlikely that the project has any serious legs.

Everyone have a great day and drive safely in the rain!

Friday Fantastic Four

First Snow!
Originally uploaded by Cavalier92

While you can't really see it in the photo, there IS snow falling in the Philadelphia region today, causing slick roads and as much as 3 inches in some of the western suburbs.  It's been a wild weather week for me, from a record high temperature of 93 in Los Angeles on Saturday to snow and biting wind today.

So today's Friday Fantastic Four will be weather related:

What are your favorite things about the weather where you live?

1. Leaves turning
2. The first snowfall
3. Indian Summer
4. The earthy dampness that you can smell after spring rainstorms

Everybody have a great weekend and enjoy the snow!!!!

Wow!

Yesterday was quite a day.  I ran hither and yon, picking John up in the Pine Barrens, both of us driving into Center City in what was really a very normal commute given that 2 million other folks were headed to town.  We had some fun with the UArts folks and hung out on the steps of Hamilton Hall basking in the sunlight of the best fall day in memory.

The crowd was raucous but well behaved save one small incident that Philadelphia Police handled perfectly.  The brawlers were identified, cuffed and taken away in paddy wagons as the crowd chanted "ASSHOLES."  The arresting officers were warmly cheered by throngs along the 300 block of South Broad Street.

Fans climbed trees, lampposts and fences, vamped, ran nearly naked on Broad Street, drank champagne, wore crowns and silly hats and generally enjoyed themselves as they packed the sidewalks 8 deep.  As the parade wound toward us, the excitement level ramped up and chants of "Let's Go Phils!" drowned out the band playing on Pine Street.

After what seemd to be an interminable procession of helicopters, tow trucks, the media, motorcycle cops, segways, horses and police cars, The Budweiser Clydesdales pulled Pat Burrell, his hot wife and Elvis thought the ecstatic screaming throng who at that moment whould have personally paid him $15 million per year for 4 years.  It ain't happening and this would mark his brightest moment as a Phil, but it was nice to see the fans acknowledge his years with us.

We saw Harry the K, Bill Giles,   the Phanatic, J-Roll, Lidge and Howard, the Mayor with the trophy and random people we didn't know.  And then they were gone and we were left to hug and high-five each other and smile for the camera and wonder what do we do next.  Many folks joined the throngs behind the parade and walked the 3.5 miles down to the stadiums. 

John and I had a cheesesteak and talked about how great this day was.

We cheered our heroes and took our pictures and held each other, trying to imprint the moment in our memories forever.  And we held open our hopes for more parades.  In January and April and next October.

What a Day!

I'll post more on this later, but today was an incredible experience. The parade was wonderful, the players were gracious, the fans were exuberant.

John and I had a great day watching the Parade of Champions.



Congratulations to the Phils!

A Great Day

I've had some very good days in my life.  Meeting a president.  Making out with a girl the first time.  Winning a scholarship to college.  The day my son John was born.  The day my daughter Emma came home from the NICU.  The day I got married.  The day my divorce was finalized.  Cutting down the nets in the old Sacred Heat Gym at Cabrini.  Playing Torrey Pines.  Driving the Green River Valley.  Sitting in the rain at Fenway.

But none of those days compared to yesterday.  The anticipation built all day.  Coming back into Philadelphia from Toronto, I drove past the stadiums and knew in that instant daydreamed of a parade Friday.  My son babbled for an hour as we drove home and his innocent certainty was infectious.  The Phils were going to win. 

I've been racking my brain all day.  Trying to think of a moment in my life that meant more to me than listening to Harry Kalas on the call as John and I held each other and jumped up and down in rapture.

And the truth is that nothing compares. 

I don't ever want this feeling to go away.

Championship Call

It was great listening to Harry on the call last night. Wheels looks like he has been riding on the short bus his whole life.